Suisun Valley Review

The Suisun Valley Review has arrived and I couldn't be happier with the outcome!

Front Cover:


How my girl looks in the book:


My poem:

Danger!

So I like to think that in the time of crisis I know just what to do. Say, for example, a 5.0 earthquake hits in a nearby city. A sane person would know to crawl under a sturdy dining table & take cover. There's even something called a safety pocket - where you place your body firmly up against your bed or couch. If something like a wall chunk or furniture should tumble down - it will hit the highest part of the couch or bed, falling at a slant so as to leave you safely nuzzled in said safety pocket.

A not-so-sane person probably would, say, I don't know...dump their glass of water into their friends lap, start charging for the front door only to turn back to a screaming friend and stand with her under the door jam, the two of you now screaming. Your friend is now crying while your other friend is talking calmly, girdle around her ankles, trying to talk sense into both of you from the bathroom.

If you find yourself opting for option two - don't feel bad. We've all been there. Very recently in fact.

Oh and p.s. - apparently it's very bad to run outside (although it seems like the safest option away from all the furniture, breaking mirrors & falling objects) because windows blow out, not in and you know...there's that whole crumbling building thing. Who knew? Guess it pays to have a friend who doubles as an Earthquake Safety Expert!!

Love/Hate

I've never been one to check my mailbox daily. Usually because the mailboxes are never on the direct route to my apartment. So after letting it fill for about three days I usually make the 50 step walk to the boxes, turn the key and have stuff falling out of it it's so full. 90% of it is junk mail & grocery store mailers...nothing that particularly has to do with me as a person, but me as a general consumer.

I hate the massive amounts of mail the stores send out and for whatever reason I don't immediately dump it into my kitchen trash. Instead I pluck out the Souplantation coupons (as their emails seem to have weened), stack it on my dining table, assuming that I might just use that KFC coupon along with my Hank's Pizza and Georgio's coupons - I never do. So after a long week of staring at the junk, I throw it all out.

Now this week is different and I've made big strides to check my mail daily. I'm waiting for my two Suisun Review books to arrive. Now yesterday when I went to check my mail there was NOTHING in there. Nothing. It was devastating and insulting all at once as though some huge mistake had been made and the guy in Apt 7 had ended up with TWO Pavilions packets. Now I'm not expecting to get actual letters from people, but what a let down! I always counted on receiving at least a mailer a day, but opening up to nothing is such a disappointment.

Oh Happy Day!

My loyal readers...I just received the most splendid news:


I'M GETTING PUBLISHED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Just got an email from The Suisun Valley Review saying that they're publishing "Thanksgiving" in their Spring 2009 issue. This is a first for me - first time submitting, first time getting accepted. I was giddy, jumping all around the office essentially running amok.

And then I was terrified that I didn't like the piece enough to have it permanently inked in a book and secondly...it has the word "shitting" in it & how can I ever show my mother?

If anyone talks to her...tell her I was peer pressured to use colorful language.

Your now-famous friend,
Anna

Silverfish

So I've had a flurry of silverfish in my apartment. Apparently this is common, because when I mentioned this to Denise who lives about 3 blocks away, she said she's always had a silverfish problem. And she keeps things pretty tidy so if she can have them...it kinda helped me not feel so grungy.

I usually catch them crawling around my bedroom, rather sprightly I might add, across my cottage cheese ceiling, which is best - easier to spot then when they're on the carpet. Gross.

Last week I saw one stuck in my ceiling light and he was a skinny little thing, probably a silverfish toddler of sorts. The following day I saw a larger fellow in there with him & the two were circling around that thing like they were in a relay race. The larger one kept trying to climb to the top of the light to escape but he'd slide back down every time. The little one really had no idea what he was doing or how he got there in the first place. Needless to say I saw toddler's skeleton through the light fixture the following day (kind of resembled a fish skeleton if you're curious - hence the name, I'm sure). The large one didn't seem too upset, but more frustrated because he still couldn't climb to the top to escape without ultimately sliding down.

I felt safe with the two of them stuck in there, but also guilty because I had the answer to their problem. I just couldn't bring myself to unscrew the light and risk them falling out onto me, getting lost in my hair.

I haven't seen either in over a week. I like to think they died a peaceful death and are resting in their grave, which is the base of the light fixture. I find myself dreading the fact that those bulbs will one day burn out & I'll find 50 dead silverfish in there.

On a happier note, I've seen a large decrease in overall silverfish activity. Perhaps those two were scouting out the the location for their clan and seeing as they didn't make it out alive the others abandoned ship. It helps me sleep at night, knowing they aren't crawling overhead...

Atheist

So I was driving home from work yesterday and stopped at a red light (go me!) behind a country blue Volvo with what appeared to be a handmade ATHEIST sign in the back window. It was black & white and scotch-taped to the inside rear window. On the right hand side there was a smaller yin & yang sticker. Interesting combo, no?

I had a giggle because I realized he was trying to make a point opposite the religious folk that flaunt their beliefs freely, like he was trying to stick it to 'em, but couldn't find any ready made stickers of his liking so he fashioned one out of printer ink and paper.

I desperately wanted to see what this guy looked like. I caught part of his face in the side mirror and an eyebrow in the rear view and maybe a ponytail? Hard to tell.

Now I don't know if he caught me squirming to get a glimpse but I noticed his right hand on the back of the passenger seat with all fingers bent in making almost a loose fist EXCEPT for his middle finger which was fully extended. Is he flipping me off? No. Is he? Would he? Could someone casually rest their hand while accidentally flipping someone off? I attempted on my thigh, concluding that doesn't just accidentally happen. I was instantly offended, wondering what look I had that made him think I was then enemy.

I decided to test it out, see what if feels like. I stared into the distance doing the whole deep-in-thought-while-running-my-hand-along-my-chin maneuver and casually extended my middle finger just ever so slightly in front of the others. My own little revenge just in case he was actually flipping me off.

When I checked back, he'd bent his middle finger under like the rest of his hand. Was victory mine? Did he catch his mistake when seeing me accidentally flipping him off? Or are we both nuts?


Don't answer.